Friday, February 10, 2012

Orphaned at 48

My poor husband sometimes feels like a poor orphan. Today his Dad would have been 90 years old, he passed away 17 years ago. His Mom is obviously alive, but because of her dementia and poor health, she doesn't get to do 'Mom' things with him anymore or even talk and relate like you would expect. His brother lives across the country and is not very involved with his family. Bill's extended family is a mixed bag of folks he would like to see more often and get to know better and those he could do without ever hearing from again. So, it's pretty much just him alone much of the time. I tell him he has his own family to build up traditions with now, but it's just not the same.

He was able to take a long lunch from work today and have a visit with his Mom. She did not remember that today was her husband's birthday. That is a mixed blessing. Normally, she gets pretty depressed on the day of his birthday. But this year she didn't seem to notice it much. She was in a good mood during the visit he said.

He was also able to get off work at a decent time so we could attend the Valentine's Day family dance at the kids public school. We really are trying to get connected to the school community, but I find it very hard. I have so little in common with most of them. But just like the children, I have to adjust and I hope that I will find a friend or two there also. It was okay. I talked with a few people I sort of knew, but there was no chance to really meet new people without just walking up to a group engaged in converstation and just barreling in, something I'm horrible at. I wish there would have been name tags. They also ran out of drinks and dessert by 6 pm, when the party started at 5:30. I wish there would have been more water and some dessert for the kids. We ended up leaving a little early and got them some icecream on the way home.

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